Script Ajustments

After experimenting with the original script, we discovered that the voice-over would last considerably longer than we had intended for it to and as a result of this were left with 2 options:

The first being to leave the monologue out entirely and just use musical accompaniment with the film, but we felt that our audiences would not learn enough about out character without the interior monologue voice-over to expand upon the character or DAN.

We therfore had to consider the option which was to shorten the script in order to it to fit the footage better.

This is our final, re-amended version of the script, that can be seen in the final version of our film opening:

DAN: How do you get your kicks? Some will choose the easy way out of the shitty existance we've imposed upon ourselves. Waking up everyday at 6.30, to get the tube with a load of cognoscenti bastards, accept their place in the nostalgia of office life, take their orders from some big shot fucking cunt in a shirt and tie, then go back to the 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom semi-detatched shit hole in the middle of 'no-wheres-ville'. Fuck that for a laugh. It's about life, it's about football, it's about the carnage that comes with it. The broken knuckles, chipped teeth, covered in claret -it comes from within. You either have it, or you fuck off.

Audience Feedback (Penultimate Version)

In order to further ensure that our film is meeting the expectations of our audience and conventions of our chosen genre, I uploaded the penultimate version of our opening two minutes again onto both Youtube and Facebook and asked for more feedback, despite minor glitches to be edited later. This version of the film has been edited since the last upload: past audience feedback has been taken into consideration, as well as music and footage now being included.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHSt5Cn4uA0

I addressed my audience in this way:

"There are just a few minor tweaks to be made, the first being the Film 4 thing at the very beginning. Once again please give me feedback, my courseworks to be handed in on thursday so all comments are appreciated "

Comments given by audience members:

From this collection of audience feedback I can understand that we were successful in both our choice of musical accompaniment, as well as our variation in camera shots and angles. The audience responds to the music in a positive way, as seen via their comments, mentioning that it suits the on screen footage and genre well.

There was one instance of constructive criticism, whereby an audience member highlights the shot of the two hooded youths on the estate. He states that he feels that the clip is cut too short and does not linger on the characters long enough, perhaps making it difficult for him to establish who they are and their role in the opening titles. In order to reprimand this I intend to take the original footage of the hoodies, and edit it so that the clip focuses on them for a second or so longer, allowing audiences to gain a better understanding of their presence.

Audience Feedback (Incomplete Version)

Although our opening titles sequence is not yet complete, I uploaded an incomplete version onto both Youtube.com and Facebook.com, along with an explanation and series of broad questions in order to gain honest audience feedback from our target audience. It was my intention to understand how audiences received and registered the information presented in the opening two minutes of the film and to discover whether we were successful in creating and keeping to the conventions of the opening to a Brit Grit film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3pIMCRXXDBc&feature=related

How I addressed my audience:

"Okay guys, basically i need your help with my AS Media Coursework. This is it so far, I'm aware the quality once uploaded to youtube isn't great and as you can see it isn't complete yet -we still have music and more footage to include, but in order to meet our criteria we need audience feedback, so please comment and give constructive criticism when needed. If you could take into account and preferably answer the following questions when you comment it, that would be great:

1) Comment on quality of editing and filming?

2) The aim is to introduce the main character fully, how well do you feel that this aim has been achieved? What is your understanding of the character and his lifestyle?

3) Based on the footage you've seen how successfully does the clip portray a British film as opposed to an American film?

Thanks"

Various comments and audience feedback received:

Based on the feedback from the public audience it is apparent that we have succeeded in portraying our character and meeting our intended targets. Despite watching the incomplete version of our opening titles, audiences were able to establish the location of the film, who the main character was and his lifestyle, some in fact were able to make premonitions and extend upon the character. For example one suggested that he "could be a bit of a roughie" meaning that even though there was no violence directly presented to audiences, it was still understandable that he may lead a violent and rough lifestyle. One viewer was also able to understand his distain for the life he leads and the way in which society works, a characteristic that will be made clearer through the involvement of a personal interior monologue, to be involved later, saying that "I don't think he wants to live there... It looks like such a chore".

Upon being asked if our film meets the conventions of a British film or if it has more connotations of an American film, the public stressed that we have created a piece that "Oozes British", meaning that we were successful in our choice of Mise-en-scene and location. Although a suggestion was made to include footage of a 'red bus' in order to further convey this 'Britishness' and appeal to audiences (as it is what they associate with London), I feel that it is too stereo-typed and that more subtle uses of props and Mise en scene, such as the English flag outside the pub, are better suited to the genre.

Audiences both praised certain techniques and offered advice and constructive criticism whereby we could improve certain areas of our footage in order to make particular aspects more apparent and smoother. One comment outlined a transition between clips that was not particularly well executed, taking this into account I then made attempts to edit, making necessary changes and was eventually able to improve the transition, making the footage flow better. One comment specifically highlighted the shot filmed as though it were from a CCTV camera, informing us that it is successful.

Email Confirming Song

In order to gain usage of our chosen musical accompaniment, Fast Fuse by Kasabian, we emailed the record company to gain permission.

It reads:

Dear sir or madam,

My name is Robbie Nichol. I am currently working on my Media Studies project in school and I was hoping you could give me permission to use the song, Fast Fuse, by the band Kasabian in my film. Thank you in advance for your time.

Robbie.

We are currently awaiting a reply from the company.

Location, Actors, Costume, Props, Schedule

Filming Schedule:

-Belthorn Crescent - Council Estate
06/03/10 Saturday - 12:00
07/03/10 Sunday - 12:00
10/03/10 Wednesday - 17:00

-Selherst Park - Football Stadium & Outside Pub
12/03/10 Friday - 17:00

-The Five Bells - Pub
20/03/10 Saturday - 12:00

25/03/10 Thursday - 17:00

27/03/10 Saturday - 12:00

Location:

Estates:

-Crystal Palace

-Selhurst

-Thornton Heath

-Balham (Chosen location: Lambeth SW12, near Balham. Images below)

We eventually agreed on this location for our film as it met our requirements for what we felt were necessary in order to portray our characters life style and the type of area in which the film is to be set. The estate is large, allowing us a variety of locations on which to shoot. The surrounding buildings are bland, dully coloured and run down, paint is stripped and peeling from some of the walls. The dull colours and grotty, urbanized area link to the settings seen in other films of the same genre, making our choice in location successful.

Pub:

- The Five Bells: 68 - 70 Streatham High Road, London, SW16 1DA, Tel: 08721 077 077

- Duke of Cambridge: 7 Holmesdale Road, Croydon, CR0 2LR, United Kingdom‎ - 020 8665 6440‎

We have chosen to film the exterior of this pub in order to establish further information about the character and setting of the story as the surrounding area is very run-down, urban and working class -estates and council housing can be seen in the background. Also, on the front of the pub we can see an English flag, further establishing the location as well as informing audiences of the characters lifestyle as we can see the slogan 'Palace and Proud' on the front of the pub.

Actors:

Dan- Yasir Saleem: This actor was chosen for the specific role of Dan as we had wanted to challenge the traditional conventions of the stereo typical, white British 'thugs' seen in other Brit Grit films, while keeping to other conventions so as not to completely stray from the genre. Another important specification for the character of Dan , that this actor met, was that he must be aged 18+ in order for us to show him on screen with cigarettes and alcohol.

Hoodie 2- Luke Howarth: We chose this actor to play one of the hoodies as we feel he meets the expectations our audience will have of the youth of today. He is male and aged between 16-18, making it possible to portray him as a teenage, working class youth, living on an estate.

Young Mum- Hannah Lenane: We chose for the characterof the teenage mum to be played by myself as I met the stereo typical ideas that our audience will have of a young mum living on an estate (white, between the age of 16-17).

Hoodie 2/ Dan Friend 2- Robbie Nichol: This actor was ideal to play both the character of a hooded youth as well as an older thug friend of Dan's as we felt that his appearance is simplistic, making it easy for his look to be manipulated via costume to become different characters successfully. For example his shaved head can be associated with both an older man as well as a youth. Similarly to the specifications of the actor to play Dan, it was important that the actor playing the role of Dan's friends in the pub was 18+, once again this actor met this specification.

Dan Friend 1- Jack Reynolds: This actor was chosen to play the part of one of Dan's friends as he is a white male, aged 18+. Important to allow continuity between the character of Dan and his friends and also as he is to be shown on screen drinking alocohol.

Equipment/Props:


Dog and leash

Pram

Cigarettes

Lighter

Storyboard

Script

The only dialogue in the opening two minutes of our film is an interior monologue, belonging to the character of Dan. In order to keep to the norms and conventions of our selected genre, we highlighted stereotypical characteristics and situations associated with the working class and used aggressive, critical and taboo language -once again linking to the characters and their lifestyle. Although use of strong language will result in reconsideration of the certificate age.

Interior monologue (drafts): The process began with drafting some ideas of what our script should include, the type of language involved, the way in which it would be spoken and what is being discussed. After analyzing the opening dialogue of other films of the same genre, we found that swear words and strong language is often used. The tone is often aggressive and enthusiastic. The message trying to be conveyed is one of criticism, arrogance and negativity.

Dan: (spoken aggressively as a voice over, as footage is seen of him walking through an estate) Some will choose the easy way out from the shitty existence we've imposed upon ourselves. They'll choose a 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom, semi-detached shit hole in the middle of suburbia, complete with the latest insignificant DIY editions from the IKEA catalogue. They'll settle into a loveless marriage just so they wont die alone, pop out a few kids and slowly descend into a sexless, joyless routine of Iceland ready made microwave dinners and saturday night TV. They'll accept their place in the nostalgia of office life, take their orders from some big shot fucking cunt in a shirt and tie, make the instant coffee and fill their place in the endless line of scum, working for minimum wages that they'll only piss away on trying to accept the lives they lead. Not for me, fuck that for a laugh. I choose life. I choose football. In fact, you can forget the fucking football, I choose the fight that comes with it: broken knuckles, chipped teeth, covered in claret. Fucking yes mate.

Interior monologue (final draft):

Dan: "How do you get your kicks? Some will choose the easy way out from the shitty existence we’ve imposed upon ourselves. Waking up everyday at 6.30 to get the tube with a load of cognoscenti bastards, and accept their place in the nostalgia of office life, take their orders from some big shot fucking cunt in a tailored suit, make the instant coffee and fill their place in the endless line of scum, working for minimum wage – that they’ll only spunk away anyway on kebabs, booze and a 10 pack of Mayfair as they try to accept the lives they lead. After that go back to the 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom, semi-detached crap hole in 'shitsville', complete with a loveless marriage that’s descending into a sexless, joyless routine of Iceland ready made microwavable dinners and dull reality TV. All of which was settled for, just so you don’t die alone. Fuck that for a laugh. I choose life. I choose football. In fact you can forget the fucking football, I choose the carnage that comes with it. Football doesn’t stem from violence, but the violence stems from football. The broken knuckles, chipped teeth, the claret covered shirt - it comes from within. You either have it, or you fuck off."

The final monologue is a combination of ideas put forward by the group. We involved parts that we found particularly effective and that best suited our aim and genre. We made attempts to highlight things that would be typical to the lives of the characters and the audience, in order for them to be able to relate to the film, characters and understand the message being presented. For example many audience members will be familiar with the lifestyle of waking up early in the mornings, to take a journey to work. They will also recognize products mentioned such as, Mayfair cigarettes, instant coffee and Iceland food and make connections between them and a working class, average-joe label.

Film Treatment

The year is 1995, London, and we see a working class estate, where old worn-down electrical appliances found on the street and blood stained walls is a norm. Two best friends (aged 10), who have grown up together, are running away from an old man with broom shouting at them. The smaller, ‘nerdier’ looking boy, TOMMY, falls over and the bigger, older-looking boy, DAN, helps him up and leads him to a back alley where they are safe from the old man. As they both catch their breath, they smile at one another and laugh about how he will get them one day and Dan promises that he will always have Tommy’s back.

The year is now 2010, and we can see a man running through an alley, looking very scared and worried, sounds of fighting are heard in the background. Another man jumps out in front of him and criticises how Crystal Palace fans are cowards. The nervous man then begins to verbally abuse the other man, causing the man to try and hit him. Before he lands his punch, another, bigger man interrupts and knocks him out. The man that interrupted then laughs before winking. We now find out that the bigger man is Dan and the nervous man Tommy. Tommy then laughs and asks why Dan is here if Millwall aren’t playing today. Dan reminds him once again that he will always have his back. This is when we find out that the two friends support opposing teams. As they are walking down the street, Tommy invites Dan to the pub for a drink but Dan informs him that all the Millwall fans are there at the moment and of how badly they would react if they saw a Palace fan with him. This is when we find out that they are part of Firms and that they are both aware of the problems this causes.

A few days later, Dan walks into the pub and meets a group of males. They singing songs about how Millwall is the greatest team in the world; this establishes that these people are the Millwall firm. They greet Dan fondly, which shows us that he is of a high rank in this particular firm.

As the film progresses we find out more about the characters and their friends, family and personalities. Eventually Dan is informed by one of the members of the Millwall firm that Millwall will be playing Crystal Palace in a weeks time and he has to be there to lead them. Dan then meets up with Tommy in his flat and informs him of this and that there is no way of getting out of it. They are both upset by this and feel as if it’s the end of their friendship because they will be forced to fight one another. The moment is sad and the characters almost brought to tears. Tommy says that both of them always knew that this day would come and they couldn’t be friends forever. Dan disagrees, telling him that they will be friends till the end.

Once the match fight time arrives, both teams’ members are all fired up and ready to fight, while Dan and Tommy are looking very serious and slightly nervous with little movement. The fight begins and we see both men beating up others but deliberately staying away from each other to avoid fighting, every so often they glance at each other. After a while, Tommy gets seriously injured with by someone wielding a knife and Dan runs through the crowsa to him, carrying him away. others members of the Millwall firm are shouting at him, asking what he is doing but he keeps running with Tommy in his arms.

Now both are in an alley way, Tommy is on the floor bleeding to death, Dan is kneeling next to him with a tear in his eye. Tommy then musters up a laugh and reminds Dan that they couldn’t be friends forever, they both laugh and Dan asks what he does now because he can’t go back or they will kill him. Tommy says that they both knew that this was a bad idea and that he is sorry, he then bids Dan farewell as he dies. Dan begins to cry, gets up slowly and walks away.